Mediations about Mona

I'm getting obsessed with Mona. Really.

So who is Mona? She is a woman who uploads pictures of herself on Flickr. In these photos, she appears to be a woman in her 50s. Maybe a bit overweight, but not by much. Nice smile. And big breasts.

That last part is easy to tell, because in most of her photos her breasts are bare. One breast (the one on her left) is a somewhat larger than the other. They both sag down. As I said, she is not a young girl by any means.

I love her photos, but what I love more is her attitude about her body, the joy she gets (and her husband gets) when she shows off her breasts. This one is under a typical photo. "Jim took this in our room at the beach resort. He has always liked me topless with jeans. I hope some of you like it also."

Here is another. In it, she is standing next to a man wearing a white shirt and a red tie. All she is wearing above the waist is a jingle bell on a red piece of yarn (I think). She writes, "This is Hubby and I at a holiday party a few years ago. I started the evening with a sheer top, but the host spilled wine on it. She wanted to soak it right away, so I took it off and went the rest of the evening with just my bell. She couldn't believe that I would, but It was so fun. It seems that there were many people who wanted pictures of us. Hubby kept saying it must be his red tie. ????"

At times she is wearing blouses, but they inevitably are very sheer, leaving her nipples easily visible. Sometimes she is at the beach (usually a Mexican resort), sitting topless on the beach and enjoying the sun and the attention. Even has a drink with a tiny paper umbrella at times.

Here's one of her in a white tube top, with about half the breasts covered. "I wear this tube top often, but on this day, it seems to have slipped down a little. I hate to see women wear something sexy and then tug at it all the time, so I try not to adjust my tops, unless my tits come completely out. Do you think this is ok?" Looked OK to me.

And yes, I have noticed that, too, when women (especially girls) wear something skimpy. Are you really trying to look sexy or are you just confused?

One picture from the 1980s show a younger Mona wearing a blue sweater that is very loose, opening wide down her chest. "This is a scan of my favorite sweater in the early 80s. I wore it all the time and it was just right. I could make sure I was covered if I felt I needed to, but I know just how to sit to allow one tit to show.

"I'll never forget the first time I let my nipples be seen in a public place. We went to a nice restaurant with another couple and we were seated in a booth with the men on one side and the women on the other. We were visiting and all at once I felt air on my left nipple. I knew it was showing and that Jim and the other guy could see it and about then this cute waiter came by. My first thought was to cover up, but I didn't and I was sooo excited.

"After the waiter left, Jim announced that I was the sexiest woman in the world. The other guy agreed, and the woman looked puzzled, when she looks at me and gasped. "How long have you been like that?" Her husband said "Only 5 minutes." But what was fun for me, was that I did not cover up the rest of the night. My nipple got so hard that it caught my neckline and would not let it up. It was the first tit flash, but certainly not the last."

Obviously, she enjoys showing off. But so what? It harms nobody, it makes her happy, and it makes him happy. I imagine they have a great sex life because she is willing to tease and show off a little ... or a lot.

And you know, I think every woman can be like that, unless they have been traumatized or raised to feel ashamed of their bodies. I don't know what inhibitions Mona had to deal with to be as open as she is now. That's a part of her story I have never read. But I think everyone has the power to overcome our cultural inhibitions about body image and that they are not "perfect" or nearly so. Or a model or cover girl on a fashion magazine. Perfect smile, perfect figure, perfect skin, perfect nails. Most women aren't like that and never will be, no matter how much they fret and anguish about every imperfection. Or how much they spend.

Mona isn't perfect either. Far from it. She is just herself. She loves herself the way she is, she loves her husband, and he loves her. She isn't afraid of making a mistake. We're all human, you know. Same frailties, same vulnerabilities, same fears to some extent.

I think we come down to two very simple facts. The first is that without our clothes, we are all naked. All men look more or less the same, and all women look more or less the same, with the same parts in the same places (with, of course, infinite variations). That is why I have never understood the cultural taboo about nudity. Aren't we all the same under our clothes? Aren't we all human?

The other simple fact is that a person's true beauty is on the inside. I have believed that for many years, and as time goes on I see more and more proof of it. As you look at all the people in the world, you can see it, too. Look beyond appearances. Look beyond the face. Look past the eyes. Yes, look beyond the boobs, too. Look inside. Only then can you start to see the true person, and you can only do that if you actually get to know the person.

Don't know Mona. Never met her. Likely never will. But I'm glad I got to know about her. She's one in a million and probably even more rare than that.